My shrink’s daughter finally agreed to have coffee with me, but not in Manhattan. She wanted me to meet her at some coffee shop near her loft on McKibben Street in Bushwick. I also found myself a day job as a file clerk for a law firm near Times Square. The dead end job paid only fifteen dollars an hour but it’s fulltime with benefits and guaranteed forty hours each week. So now, I’m looking for a cheap ass room to rent.

I hopped on the L train heading to Brooklyn to meet up with Bettina. The version 2.0 of my late shrink, Suzanne Lessing. I walked into the coffee shop and found Bettina reading “The Bell Jar” by Sylvia Plath. I pulled out a chair and sat in front of her.

“Hello stranger!” I said.
“There you are, So what’s up with your world?”
“You sound just like Suzanne.”
“What did you expect? I’m her daughter and she’s my mother.”
“I expected you to not sound like a psychologist.”
“Okay, let’s have a normal conversation then.”
“I’m up for that, Forgive me for asking you this but you never told me how Suzanne killed herself.”

Bettina’s face got serious for a moment. I wasn’t sure if she’s gonna answer my question or would just tell me to fuck off.

“You never asked. She jumped in front of the incoming train on 49th Street. I think it was the N or Q train that shred her to pieces after she fell on the tracks. When I claimed her remains at the morgue, I couldn’t even recognize her. I’m sorry, is that too much information for you?”
“No, not at all. The more you tell me that, the more I want to get high..”
“I have a bowl of Obama kush upstairs in my apartment.”

We went up to her loft and she took out the bowl of Obama kush, she told me that a friend brought it for her from Hawaii.

“So do you live in the city?” She asked while filling the pipe with pot.
“Not really, I’m just crashing at a friend’s couch in Chelsea because I haven’t found a room to rent. I just got a job.” I replied.
“Really? What’s the new job?”
“Nothing special, it’s a file clerk position at a law firm in Midtown.”
“That’s cool. You know if you’re looking for a place to rent I think I can rent out the spare room that I have here.”

Bettina finally finished fixing the pipe and started to smoke it. She inhaled like a pro, and then handed it to me. I smoked it and inhaled intensely, damn it was fucking good!

“Are you sure you want to rent it out to me? I don’t think I could afford it, it’s a room in a fucking loft.”
“I wouldn’t worry about that, I’ll let you name your price.”

I handed back the pipe to her and she smoked more. Before we know it, for some stoned reason, I started getting touchy-feely with Bettina. She didn’t really mind, she fucking liked it. We started making out like a couple of horny teenagers, the stood up from the couch. She then took off her blouse and skirt, and showed off her Victoria’s Secret bra and panty. She then walked to her bedroom and of course, I followed her. Our whole fuck session was very stoned but it also felt very good. We both fell asleep after it.

I woke up around 5:30 PM, Bettina was still in deep sleep on my side. When I looked in front of the bed, there was Suzanne Lessing, my dead psychiatrist, sitting on a chair, smiling at me.

“What’s up slut?!” Suzanne asked.
“What the fuck do you want now?” I asked back.
“I should be asking you that question, what are you doing with my daughter?”
“I’m comforting her because you killed yourself.”

I then smiled at Suzanne.

“Fucking someone’s daughter isn’t exactly comforting. Sounds like you’re trying to escape something.”
“Are we having a session right now?”
“Possibly, seems like you two are hitting it off. I could sense it.”
“You’re not mad that I just fucked your daughter?”
“Of course not, don’t be silly. But I think that it’s not a good idea for you to move in here.”
“I like Bettina, she’s smart and she’s great in bed.. I could actually see myself getting serious with her.”

Suzanne laughed her ass off.

“Seriously? You don’t know my daughter, if there’s anyone that I’d be worried about when it comes to serious relationships, she’s last person that I would worry about. You however, have this tendency to immediately trust someone emotionally, and Lorenzo, that is not healthy.”
“What’s your advice?”
“You should end this rendezvous with her before it turns to shit. I’ve seen you suffer and get hurt so much in the past and it’s too painful for me to watch it all over again.”
“I still believe in love. I’m sure I’ll meet the right person, and maybe that right person is your daughter.”
“I want you to remember that this isn’t fiction, this is reality. And reality bites you in the ass half the time. Well, time’s up!”

Suzanne stood up from her chair and left the room. I went back to sleep and when I woke up, it was around 8:30 PM. Bettina is gone, but left me a post-it. It says she will be spending the weekend in Vermont at a friend’s cabin and she will be back Monday, her note also said that I can move in anytime, and left me a set of keys on the kitchen table. I felt relieved that I finally have a place to stay along with a fulltime job. That same night, I came out to HIDEAWAY bar, also in Bushwick to catch up with my friend, Aurelie.

Aurelie got us some drinks, she had whiskey and ginger while I had a neat glass of MAKER’S MARK.

“So who did you have sex today?” Aurelie asked.
“I just fucked the daughter of my dead psychologist.” I replied.
“That sounds exciting, was it good?”
“Yes, she’s one of the best.”

At the corner of the bar, I noticed a girl with brown hair and fair skin, she’s probably about 23 or 24. My eyes were on her the whole night while talking to Aurelie.

“Lorenzo! Are you listening to me? I’m breaking up with my boyfriend! I need to find someone new tonight. Nothing serious but I need to find a guy that can make love like a member of cirque du soleil.”
“I’m sorry, that girl at the corner is distracting me.”

Aurelie looked back at the girl.
“You just wanna fuck her don’t you?!”
“I do actually.”
“I saw some guy who looks like a model by the patio, I’m gonna go say hi to him.”
“Go for it Madonna!”

I approached the girl at the corner, her name was Stella. She just moved here from Philadelphia, she’s also a fucking artist, she does painting and photography of different penises, one thing for sure she’s not gonna paint my dick or take photos of it! We started talking literature, and after a few shots of tequila and cans of PBR, we started making out. She invited me to come over to her apartment, a few blocks away from the bar but she needs to use the bathroom first. I tried to tell her that I wanna use the bathroom myself but I wanna be a fucking gentleman this time, so I watched her walked towards the only bathroom in the bar. Then Aurelie comes over, with a paint of sadness in her face.

“What’s wrong?” I asked.
“Men are such disappointments!” She replied.
“Uh-oh, what the fuck happened?”
“He told me that he only wants to stand on the corner to make a phone call but when I came over to see him, I found him making out with a dude and then told me that he still wants to have sex because he’s never been with a woman!”

I started laughing and almost couldn’t stop after Aurelie told me that story.

“Well at least he wanted to fuck you, right?”
“Yeah that’s true.”
“Then take that as a compliment.”
“I suppose you’re right.”
“Wait a minute, where the hell is Stella?!”
“Who’s Stella?”
“She’s the girl who was distracting me earlier. She said she went to the bathroom, I should probably check to make sure that she’s okay…”

I made my way to the bathroom of the bar, and when I was only two feet away, I heard someone moaning, more of like the sound of a group of people in a sexual orgy. I slowly opened the door, then I found Stella on her knees sucking the dicks of two hipster guys dressed in checked shirts and with caps that’s labeled BAE. Her head was going back and forth, I must say that she was giving an award winning blowjob. I wasn’t sure if I should be pissed or should I jump in, but something told me that I should get the fuck out of there. I also realized that if someone really wants to be with you, that person would make the effort and go out of their way to be a part of your moment. I walked out of the bathroom and found Aurelie finishing a glass of whiskey and ginger. I could tell she’s also fucking drunk.

“Hey, it’s time for us to go.” I said
“What happened to your Stella?” She asked.
“She’s in the bathroom busy sucking dicks!”

Aurelie laughed a bit.

“This night doesn’t want us to get laid isn’t it?
“I guess so.”

We both left the bar and I hailed a cab for Aurelie to get her home. I decided to walk by myself to ponder about my one night fucks, bar hook ups, or whatever the fuck you call it. Then I realized something. I realized that for the first time, I no longer felt the need to be a whorehouse just because someone fucked with my heart and soul. It’s a very liberating feeling. I also felt like released from the shackles of pain, suffering and rejection. Is this what they call a coming of age moment? If it is, then so be it!