• Bushwick In Fiction
  • Copyright Warning
  • Disclaimer
  • Support, Donate, or Tip
  • The Writer

Bushwick In Fiction

Sex, Drugs, & NYC by Vince Goodman

  • “Dark Metropolis”

    January 19th, 2015

    Having a new job definitely helped me a lot. I can call this a miracle. I know I’m not making a million dollars a year but when I look back at the five miserable months of struggle to survive here in New York City, and I was almost pessimistic, a decent paying job comes out of nowhere literally rescues me. I have to admit that I’m still feeling a little weary thinking that this is no different from suffering and it could disappear anytime. So try not to get too comfortable with the thought. Especially with my new boss, a generous and charismatic woman with an identity that still mystifies me. After I received the three thousand dollar “emergency rescue fund” from my new job, I immediately moved myself out of my friend’s couch where I was staying in Queens and used AIRBNB.COM for three weeks. I booked a transient’s room in Upper West Side, located on West 72nd Street and Broadway. Just a few blocks to the subway station. Winter weather is already kicking in and I’m beyond grateful that I secured a fulltime job and a roof above my head.

    While I was on my way to my first day of work at the HAMILTON CORPORATION, in Midtown East, I saw a homeless young woman, with no socks and sitting on the ground. I found it very difficult to pass her by without doing something. So I decided to stop by at STARBUCKS and bought her a venti size of café latte and a couple of bagels, I bought myself a grande size of cappuccino. I slowly walked towards her and gave her the hot coffee.

    “Excuse me Ma’am? Would you like some coffee and bagels?”

    She looked up to me with an embarrassed face, while holding a sign that says “I USED TO BE SOMEONE”. She accepted the coffee and bagels.

    “Thank you, I hope God blesses you…” She replied.

    “I think God already did, you have a good day!” I said.

    The rest of the New Yorkers who’s passing me by looked at my like I was crazy because I took the time to talk to a homeless person. I didn’t really give a fuck what were they thinking. The only thing that mattered was how I felt at that time. I felt good and made me realize how lucky I was. Lucky to be rescued by my new boss, Lilith. She started to take sip the coffee and has taken out the bagels and starts to eat it. I began to proceed to the corner of East 57th Street and Lexington so that I could get to work on time. I looked at the time on my phone it’s 6:38 AM. Lilith wanted me to be there at exactly 7 AM. I arrived at her office around 6:45 AM and already found her drinking a cup of coffee while looking out the glass window. She looked back at me and smiled.

    “Hello Lorenzo!” She greeted.

    “Good morning!” I replied.

    “You did something good out there..”

    “What do you mean?”

    “You just bought a breakfast to homeless girl outside. You’ve got a good heart.”

    I felt a little baffled. There’s no way that she just saw what I did because her office is forty floors up, literally the top floor of the building.

    “How did you-”

    “How did I see it? Just because I’m forty floors up it doesn’t mean that I can’t see everything around me.”

    “I believe that’s one of your impressive talents.”

    Lilith then laughed, she then handed me a leather file folder with some paper work in it.

    “I need you to take this to CYBERCOIN on Wall Street and have their CEO, Janice Robinson sign it. It’s the last ten pages of their company’s contract with us. I need you to have it done as soon as possible.”

    “Do you need me to go now?”

    “Yes, I know it’s only 7 AM but Janice wakes up at 5:15 AM every day and arrives at her office around 6:30 AM, so you should be fine. Go now.”

    “Okay, off I go.”

    I then left the office and took the number 6 train headed downtown all the way to Canal Street. As soon as I get off the subway station, I sensed that something isn’t right. It felt like something is coming my way, the feeling of doom itself was within the moment. It can’t be depression or sadness. It’s beyond those two. I finally reached the office of Janice Robinson, the CEO of CYBERCOIN, an online currency that’s taking over the use of credit cards. When I met Janice, I’m surprised to see how young she is. I would say about twenty seven years old. She’s all dressed up as if she just stepped out of a fashion photo shoot, real classy.

    “Are you from the Hamilton Corporation? Janice asked.

    “Yes, I have the last ten pages of the contract that we needed you to sign.” I replied.

    I handed over the contract to her and she started signing.

    “So how long have you been working for Lilith?” She asked.

    “Today is actually my first day.” I replied.

    “Oh wow, congratulations! Lilith is a terrific person to work for, her company has been very generous to me all these years.. What’s your name again?”

    “It’s Lorenzo. Lorenzo Basque.”

    She then finished signing the paperwork and gave it back to me.

    “It’s a pleasure meeting you Lorenzo, send my regards to Lilith.”

    “I will, nice to meet you too”.

    I left Janice’s office and headed to the exit of the building. As soon as I got out of the building on Wall Street, that feeling of dread came rushing through my veins all over again. I felt anxious and nervous at the same time, not knowing the exact reason. I just knew that something was coming. Something was wrong. I continued to walk towards the nearest subway station an noticed a black hearse parked on the corner of the street, all of a sudden, someone fell on it. It shattered the window glasses. It startled me.

    “What the fuck!!!!” I said to myself.

    People started to gather in front of the hearse car with a dead body on top of it. I looked at the bleeding face and it was Janice Robinson, CEO of Cybercoin. Her eyeballs looked towards the spot where I was standing and stayed there. It scared the shit out of me and I walked away. I took out my phone and called Lilith.

    “Hello Katya, could you connect me to Lilith right away? This is an emergency!” I frantically said.

    “What is it child?” Lilith asked.

    “Lilith! Janice Robinson is dead. She jumped off from the top of her building!! I don’t know what the fuck’s going on!”

    “Calm down, why don’t you meet me for lunch at the Bowery district? I will text you the name of the restaurant and the address.”

    “OK, I will go ahead and do that.”

    I hailed a cab and it took me to the Bowery District. Lilith texted me the information of the restaurant. It’s on Lafayette Street, the place is called INDOCHINE, a French-Vietnamese bistro frequented by Andy Warhol, Madonna, fading celebrities, and all the fucking posers. I arrived at the restaurant and Lilith was already there. The table she picked was literally in the middle of the room. Beneath the glass chandelier. I arrived at the restaurant and there was Lilith, sitting and waiting for me. I looked around there was probably seven or nine people inside the restaurant. I sat on the table with her. She greeted me with a smile, me however was still freaked out about everything.

    “Are you hungry?” Lilith asked.

    “No, but I sure could use a drink right now.” I responded.

    A blonde waitress comes over and took our orders. Lilith ordered a medium rare steak with a glass of merlot, and I had a full glass of MAKER’S MARK on the rocks.

    “You look very stressed out child, what’s bothering you?” She asked.

    “What’s bothering me?! The woman who signed our paperwork just killed herself! Are you that naïve about human life?!” I replied.

    “Lorenzo, you are totally overreacting… Why don’t you drink that glass of water, it will make you feel better..”

    “No! You will tell me what the fuck is going on here!”

    Lilith looked at me straight in the eyes, like a predator about to kill its prey.

    “You want the truth don’t you?”

    “Yes, I want the fucking truth!”

    The waitress finally brings over our order.

    “Here’s the medium rare steak and MAKER’S MARK on the rocks.” The waitress said.

    Lilith started devouring the medium rare steak that she ordered. She ate it like a beast.

    “Will there be anything else?” the waitress asked me.

    “No, I think we’re fine.” I replied.

    The waitress left and resumed her work on other patrons in the restaurant. I looked at Lilith again as finished her steak and gulped down the glass of wine. I started drinking my bourbon, still feeling strange about everything.

    “That was a good steak..” She said as she wiped off her lips with the table napkin.

    “Let’s cut to the chase, what the fuck is going on?!” I asked her again.

    “I give people what they want, they enjoy everything that this life has to offer, they becomes their own Gods and Goddesses, but then they forgot that there’s always a price to pay for what I’ve given them.”

    “Life is the price? Is that what you’re telling me?”

    “Of course not, don’t be ridiculous. Most humans don’t really have lives. Besides, what’s the point of calling it life if you eventually die in the end?”

    I finished my drink of bourbon and started chewing the crushed ice in it.

    “So what are you saying?”

    All the restaurant patrons stood up from their chairs and looked at me. Lilith stared at me with contempt in her face.
    I also noticed that all the patrons got a revolver in their hands and pointed it in their heads. I looked around and then back at Lilith.

    “What the fuck’s happening?!”

    “Let me ask you Lorenzo, do you live in reality or fiction?”

    “I will never live in reality! I will continue to live my life in fiction for all eternity!”

    Lilith laughed at me and almost couldn’t stop. Then all the restaurant patrons fired their revolvers against their own heads and blood was everywhere. On the table cloth, on the wall, and on the floor. Lilith finally stopped laughing and stared at me with some kind of farewell in her face.

    “You never learn Lorenzo, there’s no such thing as fiction or reality. You create your own world as you go along. Blood is the only currency I accept and it’s time to pay up.”

    Lilith then took out a revolver from under the table and pointed the gun at me and pulled the trigger.

    I heard the gunshot and I can’t see anything. Then I felt someone was touching my shoulder, I opened my eyes and started screaming. The female bartender in her early forties, with a hair styled like Cyndi Lauper, wearing blue jeans and a black t-shirt, took her hand off my shoulder.

    “Hey, wake the fuck up, you’re dreaming!” She said.

    My face was sweating and I looked around. I was still inside the Grassroots Tavern at St. Mark’s place in East Village. I apologized to the bartender and left quietly. I looked at the time on my BlackBerry and it was four thirty in the morning. It was all a bad dream. I had a taste of what’s life like if I ever made a deal with the devil. Although I died in the dream, I learned something from it. There are no shortcuts to any destination where you intend to live forever. Even if it’s Heaven or Hell. Back to my fucking reality, I still have to find myself a day job and find a place to live. I went back my Judy’s apartment in Queens and got a job at financial services firm the next day through a staffing agency. The office is located on Avenue of the Americas and 49th Street. At this point I decided to stop writing fiction and concentrated on reading books at Barnes & Noble in Union Square. I’m glad I found a job though. And I’m still freaked out about the nightmarish dream that I had about Lilith. But the last few words she told me got stuck in my head, “There’s no such thing as reality or fiction. You create your own world as you go along..” . In most ways I disagree with it and I still stand by the words that I told her. I will never live in reality, I will continue to live my life in fiction for all eternity. Life goes on!

  • End of a Hiatus

    December 8th, 2014

    My dear readers and followers, I am proud to announce that my online fiction series, New York In Fiction will resume its existence here on WordPress. STAY TUNED! 🙂

  • Hiatus

    November 14th, 2014

    Due to a series of unfortunate events in my personal life, I’m putting this blog, New York In Fiction, in an indefinite hiatus. I will be focusing my writing on the completion of my first novel. I just want to say thank you to everyone who followed and read all the short stories that I’ve written. THANK YOU!

  • “The Devil and Lorenzo Basque”(Part 1 of an indefinite series)

    November 6th, 2014

    It was Halloween and the streets of Manhattan was flooded with people in costumes. I however, wasn’t in costume. It was almost 7 PM and I was just leaving my temp office job in Midtown. I was supposed to meet up with my friend, Parker, a former co-worker of mine from the ad agency where I used to work fulltime before my little life turned into shit like it is right now. However, Parker texted me that couldn’t make it because he was stuck in an argument with his wife. I wanted to head back to that shitty hostel in Brooklyn but I don’t want to deal with the new manager who’s a complete asshole. I was behind on my rent for a few days and now he’s freaking out on me. I already explained to him that I have temp jobs in the city all lined up and it’s just a matter of a week and then I can finally pay him. I tried to contact some of people whom I thought were my friends, people that I’ve helped in the past, people I’ve loaned money, and people I trusted and told me that in case something happens, I can always count on them. There I was, in the middle of fucking nowhere and about to get kicked out of the shit house, none of these sons of bitches are picking up their phones. Ever since they found out that I no longer have a fulltime job and I lost my apartment in Manhattan, they’ve been avoiding me. I’m supposed to be disappointed but I didn’t really dwell on it. On the up side, I still have a couple of friends who still talk to me and actually help me whenever I ask for it. For this, I am grateful. I checked the money on my wallet and I have fifteen dollars to my name. I went to one of the cheap bars in St. Mark’s Place, Grassroots Tavern. I’ve been there before it reminded me a lot of Manhattan during the 80’s. And the best part is, a pint of domestic lager only costs three dollars. That’s good news for me.

    I stepped in the bar and found three girls dressed up as MADONNA from three different decades. And then I started fantasizing about having a foursome with the three of them. As I looked at the corner of the bar, I saw woman a wearing a white, 18th Century with a burgundy hooded cape. dress like. She’s got porcelain white skin,raven long hair that’s down to her waist, and grey piercing eyes. There was something mysterious and exotic about her face. It was impossible for me to guess her ancestry, but she’s probably Eastern European. The only thing that I’m sensing from her is, she’s definitely not from New York City and it could also be possible that she’s not from this world. She noticed that I was looking straight in her eyes and she gazed back at me like a serpent. There are very few attractive women that knows how to make a boy like me uncomfortable with a single look. I went back to concentrate on my finishing my beer. But when I looked to my left side counter of the bar, she was sitting right there. I was a little creeped out because less that a minute ago she was standing at the corner of the bar and now she sitting next to me. There’s a stupid myth that during Halloween, the Devil is free to roam the world and collect human souls. That was the first thing that entered my mind, then I told myself to stop acting like an idiot and start talking to her.

    “Happy Halloween!” I said.

    She responded to me with a smile.

    “Happy Halloween to you as well!” She replied.

    She spoke in a distinctive Cockney accent. She’s definitely from London.

    “That’s a nice costume you got!”

    “Thank you, yours as well”

    I then laughed.

    “I just got out of a temp office job”

    “I know”

    “You know?”

    “Of course I do, Lorenzo.”

    I was shocked that she knew my name. Instead of feeling strange about it, I continued to play along.

    “Haha! That’s a good one, are you a psychic?”

    “Something like that! Can I buy you a drink?”

    “Absolutely, I’m currently broke so I will not turn down an offer!”

    She smiled at me and gestured to the bartender. The bartender comes over to her like a puppy, captivated by her beauty.

    “Can I please have two glasses of MAKER’S MARK? Neat. Thank you” She ordered to the bartender.

    Okay, there’s seriously something wrong here. How can a stranger that I’ve never met know all these little details about me; my name and my drink of choice. Maybe it’s true that she’s a psychic. I believe her now.

    “So, you obviously know something about me. What’s your name?”

    “Lilith. Lilith Hamilton.”

    “You have a very cool name, I was expecting it to be Lucifer or Satan.”

    Lilith then burst into laughter, the bartender came back and served our drinks. Two full glasses of my favorite bourbon, MAKER’S MARK.

    “You never change do you?” She asked.

    “Can we change the subject of our conversation?” I responded.

    “Of course, what do you want to talk about?”

    “You, this charade or prank, knowing something about me…”

    “Am I making you uncomfortable with all the information I know about you?”

    “No Lilith. I just found it strange, that’s all. How did you my name and my favorite drink? And who are you?”

    Lilith smiled at me again.

    “You ask too many questions, child.” She said.

    “What the fuck do you want?” I asked her again.

    “I should be asking you that. That’s the reason why I came here tonight in the first place. And to be perfectly honest, you have no idea how lucky you are.”

    “What the fuck are you talking about?! I don’t have a fucking job, I already lost my apartment! My life has turned into shit!”

    Lilith then touched my face. Her palms are warm, she made me feel like teenager who’s being comforted by a maternal force. I calmed down in an instant.

    “Don’t worry child, everything is going to be okay. You’ll see.”

    “You don’t know that, you’re not God.”

    She then looked at me with a disdain in her beautiful face and took her hand off my face. I gulped down my glass of bourbon.

    “I don’t want to be like God. He watched his own son die on the cross. Don’t you ever compare me to him!”

    “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you…”

    Lilith sighed and then looked at me.

    “You didn’t upset me, it just brings back a lot of unwanted memories. I think it’s time for me to go..”

    I got a little disappointed when she told me that was about to leave.

    “Really? No, don’t go.”

    “Sorry Lorenzo, I have to be somewhere else.”

    “You’re just gonna leave me here like this? We’re just getting to know each other..”

    “Don’t worry child, We’ll see each other again.”

    Lilith smiled again at me. She took a business card out of her pocket and handed it over. The card that’s made of high grade material, possibly ivory, indicates her name: Lilith Hamilton with a logo of a serpent and a phone number 212-728-1984. I looked at the back of the card and there’s a pentagram symbol with the name THE HAMILTON CORPORATION. The more I look at it, the more it seems to move. I know it’s not the bourbon that I just had. Then the pentagram itself turned into tiny serpents on my hand. I threw it away and freaked out. Everyone in the bar looked at me. It’s fucking obvious that they all think that I’m fucking crazy. I looked around and Lilith was gone. I looked down the floor to find her business card and there it was. My typical reaction would just leave that creepy business card alone. For some reason, I didn’t feel scared or anything. The only emotion that I felt at that time was, I need someone to rescue me. And I know for a fact that this woman can. I picked up the card and placed it in my pocket. That night, I was worried of where I’m gonna crash. I called my former roommate Judy, I also used to share the rented house with her in East Elmhurst, Queens. Although there was one time that I had a little argument with her about the heater back then, we didn’t let that fuck up our friendship. She actually picked up her phone and when I told her about my situation, she texted me the address of her apartment in Long Island City, Queens. She took me in with no questions. If she wasn’t there I’d be completely fucked. I’m glad I still have friends like her. She’s living with her cat and one roommate, Gaspard, some teenager from France trying to make it as a filmmaker here in New York City. I crashed in Judy’s couch and mentioned to her that I’m currently doing temp jobs in the city and would only need to be in her shack for about a week. As soon as I retreated to the couch, I immediately fell asleep.

    The next day, my Blackberry phone started ringing and I answered it, hoping it would be a job prospect.

    “Hello?”

    “Hello, Lorenzo Basque?”

    “Yes, this is he”

    “Hi Lorenzo, this is Katya calling from The Hamilton Corporation.”

    I started having goose bumps down my spine. I felt that there’s some kind of spiritual intervention. Katya’s clear and soft spoken voice was almost like Katie Couric.

    “Hi Katya, how are you?” I said politely since this is obviously a job prospect.

    “I’m doing great, we found your resume on LinkedIn and I think we have a position best suited to your background and experience. Just to verify, you did work for the BBC and Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week, correct?” Katya asked.

    “Yes, that is correct.” I replied.

    “Excellent! We’d like you to come in for an interview. What is your availability?”

    “I’m actually available today in the afternoon if that’s okay.”

    “Okay, can you come in at 3 PM?”

    “Absolutely!”

    “Perfect! I will send you an email with the address of our office and all the other details. Please note that you will also be meeting with our President so please dress in corporate attire and bring extra copies of your resume.”

    “Pardon me to ask you this, but is Lilith Hamilton the President of this company?”

    “Yes indeed. We’ll see you today at 3 PM.”

    “Sounds good, thank you, bye.”

    There’s a sentinel in me that this is all a dream. I tried to shake myself off that maybe someone is playing some kind of practical joke on me but at the same time, this whole situation felt real and unreal. I got up from the couch and looked at the time. It’s 7 AM. I took a shower, put some clothes on and decided to go visit my favorite church in the whole world, Saint Patrick’s Cathedral on Fifth Avenue. One of the main reason why I love this church so much is because, it treats all its believers equally, even the most evil men and women in history. A lot of criminals who visited it before their court trial at the New York Supreme Court all got acquitted. Its most famous believer is former First Lady of The Philippines, Imelda Marcos. She’s the widow of the late Filipino dictator, Ferdinand Marcos. She and her husband, stole more than $10 Billion from the Philippine government and US assisted funds and funneled it into secret bank accounts in Switzerland during their two decade rule (From 1965-1986). She became famous for having more than 3,000 pairs of designer shoes and skyscraper collection in Manhattan, at the expense of the Filipino people and Uncle Sam. She was also good friends with Saddam Hussein and Fidel Castro, and a regular at STUDIO 54, during her glory days. On the day before she was tried for fraud and racketeering in the New York City Federal Court, she visited Saint Patrick’s Cathedral and prayed for her salvation. The following day, she was acquitted due to “lack of evidence” and the sympathy of the New York City jury. After she got acquitted, she immediately asked her chauffer to drive her to Saint Patrick’s Cathedral and gave thanks for getting off the hook of her crimes. Her story reminded me that salvation doesn’t only come to those who are good and miracles can still happen even to the most vile creature in the face of the planet. If that church listened to prayers of Imelda Marcos, maybe my prayers of guidance and cry for help will be heard. On the other side of the coin, it simply tells me that if you could get away with dirty work in New York, you could get away with it anywhere. Just like that Frank Sinatra song, “New York, New York”, if you can make it here, you can make it anywhere! It’s fucking ridiculous.

    I entered the cathedral and it’s still under construction. I haven’t been there for more than a month. As I walked in, something was no longer there. Maybe the Divine presence? Whenever I come in there, I would normally feel safe. But now, it’s so fucking different. Has God forsaken me? Still, I sat down in there for an hour hoping that I would feel some kind of sanctity. Still nothing. Regardless, I still prayed that God would guide me in making every major decision in my fucking existence. I hope he listened.

    I finally went over to the address of The Hamilton Corporation. It was located on East 60th Street and Lexington Avenue. The Lobby Attendant then directed me to the 30th Floor. While inside the elevator, I could hear classical opera music, it was Maria Callas singing “Ave Maria”. So fucking theatrical and I love it! The elevator finally reached the 30th Floor and as I got out, there was a pretty, well-dressed woman, looking like she just stepped out of a VOGUE magazine cover. She greeted me with a smile.

    “Lorenzo Basque?” She asked.

    I immediately recognized her voice. It’s Katya, the woman who called me this morning.

    “Yes, hi!” I replied.

    “I’m Katya.”

    “It’s a pleasure to finally meet you.”

    Katya and I shook each other’s hand.

    “Please follow me.”

    I followed Katya as she directed me to the sitting area of their office where I sat down comfortably, with a beautiful view of Midtown Manhattan. The furniture in their office are all Victorian style. The entire aesthetic of the office are all classically designed, more of like from the 18th Century. It didn’t feel like a Manhattan office at all, it felt like I was in a castle somewhere in Europe. I could even hear my own voice echo as I speak due the vast office space and not to mention the high ceilings. I fucking love high ceilings.

    “So Katya, how long have you been working here at The Hamilton Corporation?”

    “Oh, about nine months. Would you like something to drink?”

    “I think I’m okay.”

    Katya sat down across from me.

    “Alright, I will get started by telling you about what we do and our history. The Hamilton Corporation was founded in 1914 by John Hamilton in Oxford, England. His great-granddaughter, Lilith is the current President and is charge of managing and overseeing operations in our main headquarters here in New York as well as our global offices. We have office locations around the world. That includes London, Dubai, Stockholm, Beijing, Tokyo, Sydney, Paris, Berlin, Rio De Janeiro, Mexico City, Moscow, Zurich, and Tel Aviv. The Hamilton Corporation primarily started as an investment bank in England. Currently, we operate as a multi-investment firm, which means that we offer pretty much everything for our clients to invest. We own oil reserves, television stations, banks, telecommunications, fashion brands, and the last but not the least, The Hamilton Corporation owns one percent of the world’s stocks and bonds.”

    “Wow” I gasped.

    “Was that too much information for you?” Katya asked.

    “I wouldn’t say it’s too much, it’s rather impressive” I answered.

    “Well, I think Ms. Hamilton will be able to explain a more detailed summary of this company. Do you have any questions?”

    “Yeah, what’s the specific position that I’m interviewing for?”

    “Oh that, Lilith has that information for you.”

    “Okay, she’s here today right?”

    “Yes, only ten floors up.”

    I looked at Katya with a baffled face.

    “Ten floors up?”

    “I’m sorry, I forgot to mention to you that we own ten floors in this building starting from the 30th up to the 40th which is the top floor. It’s a great view up there. Let me just walk you to the elevator and Lilith will meet you on the 40th floor.”

    “Sounds good.”

    Katya walked me to the elevator and stepped in. The elevator closed in and I hear the classical opera song again. Before I know it, I finally reached the 40th Floor where Lilith’s office is situated. The elevator doors open. It was unusually dim for a top floor. All the walls and ceiling are made of glass. I could see the sky from inside Lilith’s office. In the middle of the floor, there’s a circular elevated space with a glass table and I saw a figure of a woman wearing a beige, silk dress with a headphone speaking in German. It was Lilith. She saw me and gestured to give her a few minutes. I sat down on the leather sofa before the steps to her elevated office. She finished speaking in German, and switched to Russian. Then it was Arabic, Mandarin, French, Spanish, Japanese, and Hebrew. How the fuck does she know all these languages?! If she’s really the Devil, maybe it’s true that they’ve got linguistic skills. Lilith took off her headset and smiled at me.

    “Come on up child.” She said.

    I slowly walked up the steps to her office space and stood in front of her, right across from her glass table. I’ve also noticed that the executive chair that she has is upholstered with black leather and gold, it looks very luxurious and comfortable.

    “Good to see you again!” I said with confidence.

    “I told you we will see each other again. Please, sit.” She responded.

    I sat down on the chair and that office of hers has some kind of meditative energy flowing around it.

    “This is quite an office you got here”

    “Do you like it?”

    “Absolutely! So tell me, what’s the name of the position that you have for me?”

    Lilith grinned at me.

    “You’re a very logical person. To be specific, it would fall in the category of an Executive Assistant. So, why are you here?”

    I laughed a little bit and realized that Lilith wasn’t laughing, she’s looking at me with a cold face. I stopped myself from acting like an idiot and looked at her straight in the eyes.

    “I haven’t been so lucky lately. Four months ago, I lost my job and my apartment here in Manhattan. I forced myself to work on low paying jobs and spiraled out deep into depression..”

    Lilith’s face became stricken with sympathy, looking like she’s about to cry.. I noticed that she’s feeding off the miserable story of my fucking life, so I continued.

    “And having reached the end of my rope last month and feeling severely depressed and anxious , I decided to take a little break from New York. I went to Berlin where I stayed for three weeks. I recently returned here in New York City last week hoping that there’s still a little sympathy left. So now here I am..”

    ” I understand your situation, you’re not the only one. Where are you living now?”

    “I’m living on my friend’s couch in Long Island City.”

    “Can I see your resume?”

    “Sure,”

    I took out my resume from my worn out messenger bag and handed it to her. She looked at it for about a couple of minutes.

    “Let’s see here, you studied film, you worked for production companies in Hollywood, you’ve worked for Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week, and the BBC. Tell me Lorenzo, what is it that you want?”

    I was gonna say that I needed a million dollars to put everything in my fucking life in perspective but I came up with something genuine.

    “Satisfaction with work or something close to it.”

    ” You don’t have a problem with me giving you orders and asking you to interact with out clients?”

    “No, I’ll do anything to get out from the shitty life that I’m living right now.”

    “Why is your life shitty?”

    “I’ve got no friends in this city, I’m about to get kicked out of the couch where I’m living right now and I have no fucking idea where I’m gonna go. But I do know, that I want this job.”

    She looked at my resume again and placed it down on her table.

    “Do believe in the triumph of the will, Lorenzo?”

    “Yes, most of the time I do.”

    “My great-grandfather who started this company, a hundred years ago, came up with a business idea after he got fired from his job. He was an insurance salesman. His sales figures plummeted and the company decided to let him go. But despite that, a part of him believed in himself. He explored the possibility that a man can become his own God, without believing in something that doesn’t care about him. In 1934 the Nazis stole his gold reserves in Germany and left him with nothing. Then in 1944, his business came back to life again. It’s also called resilience which I believe that you do possess. What is your sign?”

    “You mean my zodiac sign?”

    “I’m a Leo”

    “The Lion. You should be the master of your Universe right now.”

    “I’m sorry, I’m-”

    “Don’t be, it’s okay. Just because you have nothing right now, it doesn’t mean that you can’t have everything eventually. After all, you and I share the same sign.”

    “This is the first time I felt optimistic in four months.”

    “That’s the only way you should feel child.”

    “Could you please stop calling me child?! I found that very weird.”

    “I tried to have children of my own in the past, but I miscarried all of them. And I reached the point where I can no longer have a child of my own. And all their fathers left me as well. I know you find it strange that I called you that but to me it means something when I see a young person, a promising young person, I would treat that person as my own. I hope you understand.”

    “Lilith, I’m so sorry, I didn’t know that about you.”

    “That’s okay.”

    “I’ve been feeling very tired lately, that’s why I said those things.”

    “Child, your boat of suffering has sailed.”

    I then looked at Lilith with some kind of relief in my face. I never heard anyone said something like that to me before. It felt like a burden has been lifted from my shoulders.

    “You will never have to worry or be afraid of anything. I’d like you to return here tomorrow at exactly 7 AM, don’t be late. I will have you sign some paperwork and arrange for your start date next week. You’re hired! Welcome aboard!”

    Lilith raised her right hand for me to shake and I did.

    “Thank you so much! You literally just rescued me. Before I leave, I’d like to ask you something but I’m a little embarrassed.”

    “What is it?”

    “How much is my salary?”

    “Oh the money? That’s the easy part, you will be compensated $2500 per week plus overtime and full benefits. You have any other questions?”

    “Yes, would it be possible to ask for an advance? I have no penny to my name right now, and I’m so sorry to ask you-”

    “Say no more. There’s a $3000 cash waiting for you downstairs, it will not be taken from your paycheck, consider it as an emergency compensation. You may pick it up from Katya.”

    “It was already waiting for me?”

    “Yes, prophecy is a gift.”

    Lilith said that sentence with a bright smile in her face.

    “Thank you!”

    “You’re very welcome! I will see you tomorrow at 7 AM.”

    I slowly walked out of her office and felt weird again that Lilith has the ability to foresee what I need before I even asked for it. I was still in disbelief that a complete stranger just rescued me, financially. Whatever talent she has, she’s putting it in good use. Until now, I’m still confused about the nature of her identity and the functions of the new job. She can speak many languages, can foresee when someone needs something. I think this is the beginning of a different life for me.

    TO BE CONTINUED…

  • “A Neverland Of My Own”

    October 30th, 2014

    I looked out the window of my private hostel suite and realized that three weeks of being away from New York City is too damn long. This whole European trip was acted on the spur of the moment. As everybody knows, I hate to plan things. But now, I’m gonna have to face a couple of problems when I get back in New York. A new job and a roof above my head. I told my friends in Berlin that I already have a new job when I get back to Manhattan but the truth is, there is no fucking job. Not a place to go. Wait, there is a shitty hostel in Brooklyn where the guy managing the place is a good friend of mine and I know for a fact that he will let me crash in there. So the roof above my head is taken care of. But what about the fucking job?

    The following night, I hopped on the plane back to New York City. There’s some of excitement when the plane took off. It felt like the first time I moved to New York from California. It feels like the first time.

    Back to the job bullshit. I’ve reached a point in my life that where I stopped caring. What kind of shit job am I gonna get this time? I’ve done so many day jobs and all it gave me was pure misery. I cannot seem to hold a 9-5 job for a million reasons. I mean it’s great to have regular income but what if you’re not happy? Majority of Americans work on jobs that they hate or don’t even like. But for the sake of survival, they all took it up the ass, just like a third world hooker desperate for cash. Do I have to follow the same pattern?! No fucking way!

    Then I started thinking of Peter Pan and Neverland. Even Peter Pan says that the key to not grow up is in liking what you do. It’s obvious that he achieved immortality by believing in himself alone and refusing to bend over to a conformist society. Which reminded me a lot of my friends from high school. Some of them are successful, some of them are still living in California. I wasn’t able to recognize most of them because they all looked so old and different. It’s like the rest of them changed while I stayed the same. Is it my refusal to grow old? As you get older, you become more cynical about life. I have noticed that within myself and among the people I know. With me, it’s a constant battle. Trying to prevent myself from waking up to the horrible realities of this world and convincing myself at the same time that anything is possible and anything can be forever if you really want it to. It’s a daily battle. In Neverland, everything manages to stay the same throughout the centuries. Nothing grows old. That’s the life that I want, that’s the world that I want. New York City is my Neverland.

    My plane landed at JFK Airport and I took the subway back to Brooklyn. I only have one duffle bag with me, so it wasn’t a big deal. I went back to the same shitty hostel where I was staying. It’s back to zero. I got a call for a few temp jobs in Manhattan, and the idea of having new jobs doesn’t thrill me any longer nor it makes me feel better. The only thing that still fascinates me is my writing. I have my noticed that my interest in writing has remained the same. When I got to the hostel, I noticed that my cash is running low. So that means that I need to figure out where my crashpads are gonna be. I planned to crash at the couches of my friends. I have to schedule each one. Which reminds me of the Coen Brothers film which I recently watched, “Inside Llewyn Davis”. It’s about a struggling New York musician during the early 60’s who spent the majority of his life sleeping on the couches of his friends. Llewyn Davis refused to get a day job since he pursued a musical career full time and stayed true to form throughout the film. But there was also a point where he almost “gave up” on his music because he felt “tired, so fucking tired” and surprisingly towards the end of the movie he still continued to play music. It’s a harsh reality of life when you take a closer look at it. People who never struggled, people who never took risks, people who never had to worry about their financial situation will never be able to relate to Llewyn’s story. I’m in that situation right now and it’s not a pleasant experience. But I’m staying optimistic and hope that I will get full time work soon.

    Is it wrong to have a Neverland of your own?

  • “A New Yorker In Berlin” PART 2 OF 2

    October 22nd, 2014

    bradenburgSven and I left the hostel and went to see the Berlin Wall. While we were walking to the train station, Luxemburg-Rosa Platz. There is a sense that he’s still wants to say something but he’s just holding it back. I don’t know what else to say to him if he opens up about his emotions again. The problem is, I don’t feel the same. It’s kind of ironic that I fell in love with a German girl four years ago, who doesn’t feel the same. And now, a German boy is falling for me and I’m the one who doesn’t feel the same. I kind of feel bad for Sven. I have to realize and face the fact that maybe he’s just confused and going through a difficult break up with his girlfriend. Any person in this position is very vulnerable. I know that for sure, because I was completely ruined by someone that I truly loved (Hanna, the CUNT). Sven and I finally arrived at the Berlin Wall and started admiring what’s left of it, and of course, the graffiti.

    “Hey Lorenzo,” Sven asked.

    “What’s up?” I replied.

    “I’d like to apologize about everything that I said to you yesterday.”

    “Oh don’t be.”

    “You’re not mad?”

    “Of course not, I was in a phase like that before..”

    “You never told me the details about it, mind if I ask?”

    I sighed. I no longer enjoy telling stories about How Hanna and I met. Before, I feel like I enter a different dimension every time I tell the story of how I fell in love with her. But now, whenever I tell anyone about my fucking love story, I feel like I’m digging my own grave. Ah fuck it! If I won’t have the balls to tell this stupid love story or always fear this.. That would make me a pussy! No sir! No fucking way, I decided to just tell the fucking story. Because I refuse to run away from my past, just because it makes me feel like shit.

    “Alright, I may not tell it a hundred percent but I will try my best. I met Hanna when I used to work at a hostel in New York City. There wasn’t an instant attraction when I first met her.” I said.

    “So who made the first move?” Sven asked.

    “I did.”

    “Oh yeah? How?”

    All of a sudden, I started feeling excited again. Excited about telling my story – How I fell hard for someone who doesn’t give a fuck about me. A romance that’s so fucking classic! The only thing that’s different about me while telling this story is, I feel emotionally damaged and proud at the same time.

    “Well, at that time I just moved to New York from California and I was fucking broke. So when she asked me if I could accompany her to some bars in Manhattan, I immediately said yes thinking that she would pay for all my drinks.”

    Sven laughed at me.

    “Wait, she paid for all your drinks?!”

    “Fuck yeah! I was broke man…”

    “So how did you fall in love with her?”

    “What?”

    “You heard me, how did you fall in love with her?”

    That’s a fucking difficult question. Where am I going to start? I asked myself. I decided to continue anyhow, just to keep going.

    “While on our way to East Village, we were both drinking two cans of FOUR LOKO (A drink that was banned before in both New York and New Jersey for being too fucking strong.). So I told her all my darkest secrets and she told me that she’s just traveling the world to forget her problems.. And that her mom committed suicide because her dad left her for another woman. And the following I saw her differently. The damages of life that brought us together made me feel special.”

    “Shit dude, that’s sucks. What about you? What’s your darkest secret?”

    “I never saw my own mother and father in the same room. Ever. It’s one of those things that I’d like to see within my lifetime. But I don’t think it’s going to happen. Both of them separated already before I was born. Maybe I wasn’t good enough that’s why they hated each other so much.”

    “Don’t say that, sometimes things don’t work out between two people and it’s nobody’s fault.”

    “That’s bullshit! Do you even hear yourself?!”

    What Sven said only infuriated me. When someone has a fucked up life and you say these kind of shit, it doesn’t help! I’m sure he’s only trying to make me feel better but to be perfectly honest, it only does the opposite.

    “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you feel bad..”

    “No, it’s okay. I’m sure you’re only trying to help.”

    “What I meant to say was, it’s not your fault.”

    “I know it’s not my fault. But being the child between a father and a mother, who refuses to be in the same room with their only kid, tells me otherwise.”

    “So how are you feeling now?”

    That question stopped me on my tracks. It’s been a hundred years since someone asked me that question. And to tell you the truth, I have no fucking idea on how I’m feeling now. Holy shit! Am I turning into a 21st Century zombie?! Fuck that! I try so fucking hard not to be like that – someone who just goes through life like a hollow human skin with nothing inside. I’ve seen a lot of people living like that, trapped in a pattern of doom.

    We continued to walk the stretch of the Berlin Wall, and I was quiet for about five minutes and still not being able to answer Sven’s question. My answer to his question kept playing at the back of my head which made me feel like a schizophrenic person.

    “You want to know how I’m really feeling now?!” I blurted out.

    “Yes, tell me.” Sven replied.

    “Since Hanna, I haven’t loved anyone. I’m too fucking scared of feeling that way again. I make it very impossible for anyone to love me! Hanna was my first and last chance of this so called “serious relationship” and now it’s over! Thanks to that bitch, I’ll never know what it’s like to have a serious romance with any human being! I spend my Friday and Saturday nights in bars and sex clubs with countless strangers and sometimes on Tinder! I don’t know what I’ve become, I don’t fucking know. So the answer to your question is, I am not okay! That’s how I’m feeling now! I feel less than zero most of the time! Did that answer your question?!”

    Sven stood there looking at me with emotions in his face. I’m not sure if he feels sorry for me or amused of my pathetic behavior.

    “What about love?” He asked.

    “I already walked out of it four years ago!” I answered.

    “That’s it?”

    “I’m done”

    He looked disappointed and stood closer to me. He then touched my face with his hand.

    “You know, it’s really sad when you make assumptions about being done with love. Never say never.”

    I slapped his wrist off my face, and I think I scared him off a bit.

    “Let’s go back to the hostel, I want to get fucking drunk!” I said.

    “Alright, whatever makes you feel better.” He replied.

    We left the Berlin Wall and walked back to the train station that took us back to the hostel. I got so fucking drunk that night, Sven did not drink and spent the night just listening to my bullshit. I realized that if I ever had a city of emotions, it would be Berlin. Even though, the emotional flashbacks that it brought me wasn’t always good, I’d still wouldn’t change a thing. Because if you change one thing, it will change everything.

  • “A New Yorker In Berlin” (PART 1 OF 2)

    October 18th, 2014

    I woke up in Berlin’s Schonefeld airport at around 10:30 AM. I opened my eyes and found a pretty stewardess trying to wake me up because all the passengers has already gotten out of the plane. She has platinum blonde hair and light blue eyes, if it’s 1935 in Germany, she would be the ideal poster girl for the Hitler Youth.

    “Sir? We have arrived in Berlin..” She said.

    “What?”

    I was still feeling a little groggy from the sleeping pills that I took when the flight left New York City.

    “I’m sorry Sir, but you need to exit the plane now.”

    “Okay, no problem.”

    I only had one carry on, a leather duffle bag that I kept on the compartment. I finally got up from my seat and started to retreat from Air Berlin. I walked straight to the arrivals area and went through the checkpoint where they would check my passport and asked me if I was there for business or pleasure. And of course, I said pleasure. So I got cleared at the checkpoint and then met my chauffer which I booked online, he’s carrying a sign with my name on it. The Mercedes-Benz car was too expensive so I opted for the Volkswagen. The car service dropped me off right in front of the WOMBATS HOSTEL in the Mitte District of Berlin, later I found out that it’s the German equivalent of Brooklyn’s Williamsburg neighborhood, which literally means that I’m fucked with all these hipsters. I checked myself in for a private room and planned to get piss drunk on the bar that they have on the rooftop of the hostel. I checked my Facebook messages and found that my Italian friend Rizzo who lives in Rome, just arrived at the lobby. Rizzo and I met at an illegal hostel in Queens nears La Guardia Airport where I was subletting a small room. I came down to the lobby to pick him up and then we headed up to the rooftop bar. Rizzo insisted to buy our first rounds of drinks, he had a Berliner beer and I ordered my favorite, Weihenstephaner and a glass of Jaegermeister. I also met a group of traveling Americans who like myself, visiting Europe for the first time. And to be perfectly honest, I wish I never bumped into them because they won’t stop bitching about the inconvenient differences between Europe and America. So I thought to myself, why the fuck are you here then? Not to stereotype Americans who travel but if you have nothing positive to share about your travels, then shut the fuck up!! My friend Rizzo got piss drunk and started and flirting with a couple of girls from New Delhi. I also met fellow New Yorkers and they also bitched that were tired of traveling and cannot wait to go home. I got sick and tired of hearing their bullshit, so I left the table and went to the balcony of the bar, where it has the view of the Berlin skyline, I took out a cigarette from my pocket and lit it up and started smoking. I heard some guy walking in the balcony, wearing a brown sweater with a flag of Germany, he approached me and asked for a light.

    “Do you have a lighter?” He asked.

    “Sure,” I replied and gave him the lighter.

    With his accent, I could tell that he’s German. Which fucking reminded me of Hanna.

    “Enjoying your time in Berlin?”

    “Not yet, it’s my first time here in Europe. What about you?”

    “It’s my second time. I live in Munich”

    “So what brings you back to Berlin?”

    “It’s the wedding of my ex-girlfriend.”

    When I heard his last sentence, I immediately found respect for him. He got some balls for going to the wedding of his ex-girlfriend. Because I know for a fact that if it was me, I wouldn’t go. No fucking way.

    “Oh shit, I’m sorry to hear that…”

    “That’s alright, it’s my decision to come. She never invited me anyway”.

    I then laughed and was amused a little bit.

    “Didn’t mean to laugh at you but I think you just became my personal hero. I was in love with a girl once..”

    “Was in love?”

    “Yeah, I was.. ”

    “What about now?”

    “Now? I don’t know.”

    I then decided the subject of the conversation.

    “So what do you do?” I asked.

    “I’m a photographer.” he replied.

    “That’s really interesting. I dated a bisexual girl once and she always took my photos, they’re now always used on my profile pic on Facebook.”

    “That’s always beneficial.. What about you? What do you do?”

    “I’m a writer.”

    I said my profession with confidence in me. For the first time in my life, I can proudly say that I earn a living writing fiction. I then smiled at myself.

    “That’s awesome! I don’t meet a lot of writers.”

    “I know, writers are becoming extinct. Now all we have are bloggers, nothing against them but I still prefer the traditional way of writing”.

    “Like carrying a small leather notebook with everywhere you go?”

    “Yeah, what’s wrong with that?”

    “Nothing at all. Any of your work been published?”

    “Yes, I had one. I’m currently working on my second novel and I don’t even know when it’s going to be finished.”

    “What’s your name again?”

    “Oh sorry, I’m Lorenzo. Lorenzo Basque”

    “I’m Sven. Where are you from?”

    “New York City. And you’re from Munich..”

    “That’s right.”

    For some reason, the more I converse with him, the more he embodies the masculine of Hanna. And I really fucking hate it, when a person takes me down memory lane where I still considered myself a human being, with human emotions.. Now, I don’t know what to consider myself. I feel like a deranged raven that cannot be tamed, some kind of fucking monster.

    “Well, it’s nice to meet you. I better go back inside to check on my friend.”

    “Same, I will see you around.”

    I went back inside the rooftop bar and found Rizzo taking different turns in kissing those two girls from New Delhi. God bless him. I’m so proud of my friend! The next day, my friends from London, Danny and Joe, also arrived in Berlin after I invited them to take my first ever, German pub crawl. They’re one of my very few writer friends. Danny owns a pub in London where he draws his inspirations from all the weirdos who frequents his pub. Joe works for a brochure company where he’s in charge of all the writing. I also met them both at the hostel back in Queens, four years ago. I’m still going through those days, where I have to get a 9-5 job just to survive. Whenever I feel tired of it, I just think of Shakespeare… Even he himself, has to work as a money lender throughout his writing career, and also during the time of famine, sold grain and barley to his neighbors. If William fucking Shakespeare can do it, so can I!

    Danny and Joe decided to skip lunch and went to see the Reichstag building that day. They could only spend one day in Berlin because they have to go back to their jobs in London. Rizzo and I went to lunch at Hofbrau Haus Biergarten, we ordered the Berlin delicacy, Eisbein – slow roasted pork shank with homemade sauerkraut, and mashed potatoes. You can’t get any more German than this. While eating, Rizzo got a phone call from his girlfriend in Amsterdam. His face became serious and pale.

    “What’s wrong?” I asked.

    “Everything.” Rizzo answered.

    I stopped stuffing my mouth with food and gulped on my bottle of beer.

    “Tell me, what is it?”

    “My girlfriend is pregnant and I need to come back to Amsterdam”

    “Fuck, that sucks man”

    “I know I promised to hang out with you here in Berlin but I really have to get back to Holland.”

    “Don’t worry about it, I understand completely.”

    We finished our meals and went back to the hostel. Rizzo left for Amsterdam that night. Danny, Joe, and I went to this techno club called TRESOR. We went inside the club, located in an abandoned factory, which I think is a pretty cool venue. We arrived at the club and found interesting characters inside. With ages ranges from 18 to 60 years old. I must say that the German club scene is the most diverse that I’ve ever seen. I would never see an age diversity like that in Manhattan. We started getting our grooves on in the middle of the dance floor and surprisingly, the DJ’s booth is on the elevated part of the middle floor as well. The DJ then remixed some notable tracks from FATBOY SLIM, MOBY, LYKKE LI, and ROYKSOPP. I forgot to buy myself a drink so I went to the bar. Across from me is one of the prettiest girls inside the club. She’s got curly dark hair, skin white as snow, deep blue eyes. If I’m not mistaken, she’s probably around 18, and that made me feel a little weird. The idea of a 30 year old like me fucking an 18 year old. Oh fuck it! I’m in Germany and I’m horny! Tonight I will get laid!

    “Excuse me, could you pass the menu?” She asked.

    “Sure” I responded.

    The intentions in her eyes won’t stop staring at me. Is it my exotic background? I’m half-Italian and half-Singaporean. Thanks to my father who’s from Europe and my mother from Asia. East meets West. My parents courted each other in college back in Los Angeles where I was born and the rest is fucking history.

    ” Wie gehts?” She asked me speaking in German.

    “I’m sorry, I don’t speak German” I responded.

    “Oh I’m sorry, forgive my poor English”

    “That’s alright, I understand your English, that’s all that matters.”

    “Are you from South America?”

    “No, I’m from New York City.”

    Her eyes then widened with excitement, and I could tell she’s having an internal orgasm.

    “I’m from Heidelberg, just visiting Berlin for the weekend. What’s your name?”

    “I’m Lorenzo.”

    “Aren’t you going to ask me mine?

    “Is that important?”

    I then smiled at her like a dickhead.

    “That’s mean…”

    She smiled back a little bit.

    “I’m sorry, I was just kidding. So tell me, what’s your name?”

    “I’m Heidi”

    “Heidi from Heidelberg, I love that about you..”

    Heidi then laughed a little bit.

    “Please don’t make fun of my name..”

    “Oh come on now, I’m not making fun of you..”

    I grabbed Heidi’s hand and held it softly in my palms and then placed it on my chest.

    “Do you feel that?” I asked.

    “Feel what?” She responded.

    “My heartbeats, it’s getting faster. It means you’re making me nervous..”

    “I make you nervous?”

    “Yeah, in a good way. Why don’t we have a drink and then party some more at my hostel? There’s a rooftop bar there where we could hang out in open air.”

    “Yeah, I want to do that.”

    I looked at the dance floor and saw Danny and Joe chatting a couple of girls, I eventually found out that those girls are from Ireland. Heidi and I did a shot of tequila. I called Danny and Joe and the four of us took a taxi back to the hostel. We went straight up to the rooftop bar where we joined other travelers who drinking the night away. I ordered a couple of more beers for me and Heidi. She was admiring the view of Berlin at the balcony, I handed her over the beer.

    “Thank you”

    “You’re welcome”

    “Do you have a private room?”

    “I booked a private suite, I think I spent enough days sleeping in bunk beds..”

    “Let’s drink the beer in your private suite”

    “Sounds good to me.”

    She grabbed my hand and we both headed towards the elevator down to my room on the 5th floor of the hostel. I waved goodbye to my friends, Danny and Joe as me and Heidi walked out of the rooftop bar. We stepped out of the elevator and bumped into Sven. He looks a little upset.

    “Hey Sven, what’s up?

    “I was actually hoping to see you…”

    “Really? What’s up? Sorry, this is my friend, Heidi.”

    Heidi and Sven both said hi to each other. I sensed that Sven is having some kind of emotional breakdown. I experienced that phase before and I know exactly what it’s like. I gave my card key to Heidi and told her to let herself in Room #504 and wait for me.

    “Sven, what’s wrong?”

    ” I saw her, and she turned me away… I wanted to talk to you because I know that you’ve been in love with someone before who never loved you back. I just, I just wanted to talk and hang out with you that’s all..”

    “I hate to do this but I have company in my room… I tell you what, let’s have breakfast tomorrow around 8:30 AM, sounds good?”

    “OK, I will see you tomorrow, I’ll just drink my sorrows away at the bar upstairs.”

    Sven got inside the elevator and went up to the rooftop bar. I continued to my room where I found Heidi lying in bed waiting for me. I jumped on bed and made love to her like a fucking teenager. She rode me like an expert, we tried different positions, and for someone in her late teens like her, she’s pretty damn good and experienced. I can now proudly say, that I’ve had some German orgasm. The next morning, I woke alone in my bed. Heidi was gone. She was a fucking player. on my night stand, I found a piece of paper, where she wrote her email address if I ever want to get in touch with her. I know for a fact that I’m not the only she plays around with, not that I disrespect girls like her, I actually admire them for having the spine to be themselves and not being worried to be labeled as a slut or a whore. Because in today’s still sexist world, the world reacts differently to the gender who’s doing it. If a man fucked a thousand women, he’s cool. If a woman fucked a hundred men, she’s called a slut. I just don’t get it. I never understood the idea of discriminating someone based on their gender.

    As I stepped out of my room, I saw Sven sleeping at the corner sofa, by the elevator. I woke him up.

    “Hey Sven, wake up” I said.

    He slowly opened his eyes.

    “Hey, I tried to wait for you out here last night…”

    I raised my eyebrows and feel kind of strange for a minute.

    “I was with a girl last night, you knew that. Anyway, let’s go have breakfast downstairs.”

    “Sounds perfect.”

    He and I went downstairs where they have the breakfast buffet that costs four euros per person. Sven is still acting kind of strange. He wants to say something but something is holding him back. I was wondering what it was.

    “Okay, Sven stop it.” I said.

    “Stop what?” He replied.

    “You’ve been acting strange since last night. Could you just tell me what the hell is going on?”

    “I went to see my ex-girlfriend last night and she told me that she doesn’t ever want to see my again.”

    I sighed and felt very bad for him. I wish I could say that it’s going to be an easy phase but I don’t want to lie to him.

    “I’m so sorry dude, I know it’s fucking hard but it will eventually pass.”

    “And one more thing,”

    “Yeah, what is it?”

    “I think I like you.”

    I almost choked on the orange juice that I was drinking. I put down my glass on the table and looked at him straight in the eyes.

    “What the fuck are you saying?”

    “I know I only met you last night but since then, I cannot stop thinking about you. You’ve been camping in my head. I’m sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable. I’m just telling you how I feel.”

    “You didn’t make me feel uncomfortable. I don’t think that this is the right place and the right time to be honest about emotions like that.”

    “So where is the right place and the right time?!”

    I was confused for one minute and didn’t know how to respond to him. Do I feel some slight attraction towards him? His physical appearance is reminiscent to Marlon Brando, except that he got deep blue eyes and dirty blonde hair, just like Hanna. I’ve been fucked over by Hanna, the last person that I truly loved and since then, I found it very difficult to emotionally connect with people that are attracted to me or I’m attracted to.

    “Listen, I also like you but not that way. And about being the right place and the right time, I don’t know what to tell you…”

    “Alright, I understand. Would you take a walk with me to the Berlin Wall?”

    “Sure.”

    I don’t know why the fuck I said yes. But I was in a tough corner.

    TO BE CONTINUED…

    40.712784 -74.005941
  • Thank You!

    October 13th, 2014

    I know I never said this before, but I just wanted to say thank you to all the followers and readers of New York In Fiction. My short story series will continue! Thank you all!!  🙂

  • Disclaimer

    October 11th, 2014

    All the characters, situations, and events described here in my online short story series are all work of fiction. The only thing that’s real described here is New York City. Any similarity to a real life character or history is purely coincidental.

  • “Catastrophe”

    October 10th, 2014

    It was a normal Monday morning. I’m getting ready to get on with my 9 to 5 job. It’s been three weeks since I started working for this hedge fund firm located on Lexington Avenue and East 57th street. But there was something different during that morning. I didn’t feel like myself. I felt like a fraud. I ignored that feeling within myself and hopped on the number 1 train heading to Midtown. While on the train, I looked around me and wondered, “How many people in this subway ever had dreams when they first moved here in New York City, how many of them continue to pursue it? How many of them have given up? The guy playing the cello first caught my attention, then the young mother carrying her infant child going arounf asking for alms. Then I thought to myself, what about me? The past four years of my existence here in Manhattan, was it a joke?, a failure? Or simply an ambition still in process? I started to feel anxious and depressed. I realized that the life that I’ve been living, the day jobs I’ve taken are all mediocre. I did it all because I need to, not because I want to. And for that, I feel fucking guilty and I owed a lot of things to myself. If you’re gonna live your life, you will do it because you want to not because you need to. I felt like shit again, the black wolf with yellow luminous eyes started appearing before me right there in the subway. It was just standing there gazing at me. I was fucking terrified and scared. All the positive energy slowly fades away from me. Then everywhere I looked, just turned into darkness.

    When I opened my eyes, I found myself on a platform of a train station somewhere in Queens. I looked at the time on my cell phone and it was 4:55 PM. I can’t believe that I fucking blacked out. I also found at least fifty missed phone calls and fourteen voicemail and text messages. For the first time, I felt fucking lost. I had no clue or recollection how this whole thing unfolded. I didn’t even know what the fuck was happening to my life. I called my manager at the hedge fund firm and told him that I wanted to quit because the current life that I’m living doesn’t make any sense. My manager was nice guy, he even tried to persuade me to reconsider my resignation but my decision was already concrete. The condition that I was in needs to be repaired. I need to take a long break from New York City and the craziness that comes along with it. It could’ve been possible that all the negative experiences I’ve had has taken its toll on me… Or maybe the fact that I’ve been living a life of pretending, living a life that does not belong to me. The very next day I booked a weekend flight to Berlin. I have always wanted to see Germany and I think now is the ideal time to see it. I picked a hostel from the “TOP TEN PARTY HOSTELS IN THE WORLD” and emailed all my friends (Including Hanna, the CUNT from Munich who really fucked me up) across Europe. I booked my stay in Berlin for three weeks.

    Before I left New York City, I realized that I’ve become so jaded from all the things that the city has provided me. Some of my friends thought that the move that I was about to do doesn’t make any sense, but they don’t know shit. They never had the spine to step out of the tiny bubble that they’re living in and there’s no use in talking to people like them. So here I am venturing into an unknown frontier. That’s just who I am, when I’m uncertain about something I just move forward and go on with my wanderlust. And it’s important to recognize the time to go away in order to return the life that belongs to you.

    TO BE CONTINUED…

←Previous Page
1 … 3 4 5 6 7
Next Page→

Blog at WordPress.com.

 

Loading Comments...
 

    • Subscribe Subscribed
      • Bushwick In Fiction
      • Join 41 other subscribers
      • Already have a WordPress.com account? Log in now.
      • Bushwick In Fiction
      • Subscribe Subscribed
      • Sign up
      • Log in
      • Report this content
      • View site in Reader
      • Manage subscriptions
      • Collapse this bar