Having a new job definitely helped me a lot. I can call this a miracle. I know I’m not making a million dollars a year but when I look back at the five miserable months of struggle to survive here in New York City, and I was almost pessimistic, a decent paying job comes out of nowhere literally rescues me. I have to admit that I’m still feeling a little weary thinking that this is no different from suffering and it could disappear anytime. So try not to get too comfortable with the thought. Especially with my new boss, a generous and charismatic woman with an identity that still mystifies me. After I received the three thousand dollar “emergency rescue fund” from my new job, I immediately moved myself out of my friend’s couch where I was staying in Queens and used AIRBNB.COM for three weeks. I booked a transient’s room in Upper West Side, located on West 72nd Street and Broadway. Just a few blocks to the subway station. Winter weather is already kicking in and I’m beyond grateful that I secured a fulltime job and a roof above my head.

While I was on my way to my first day of work at the HAMILTON CORPORATION, in Midtown East, I saw a homeless young woman, with no socks and sitting on the ground. I found it very difficult to pass her by without doing something. So I decided to stop by at STARBUCKS and bought her a venti size of café latte and a couple of bagels, I bought myself a grande size of cappuccino. I slowly walked towards her and gave her the hot coffee.

“Excuse me Ma’am? Would you like some coffee and bagels?”

She looked up to me with an embarrassed face, while holding a sign that says “I USED TO BE SOMEONE”. She accepted the coffee and bagels.

“Thank you, I hope God blesses you…” She replied.

“I think God already did, you have a good day!” I said.

The rest of the New Yorkers who’s passing me by looked at my like I was crazy because I took the time to talk to a homeless person. I didn’t really give a fuck what were they thinking. The only thing that mattered was how I felt at that time. I felt good and made me realize how lucky I was. Lucky to be rescued by my new boss, Lilith. She started to take sip the coffee and has taken out the bagels and starts to eat it. I began to proceed to the corner of East 57th Street and Lexington so that I could get to work on time. I looked at the time on my phone it’s 6:38 AM. Lilith wanted me to be there at exactly 7 AM. I arrived at her office around 6:45 AM and already found her drinking a cup of coffee while looking out the glass window. She looked back at me and smiled.

“Hello Lorenzo!” She greeted.

“Good morning!” I replied.

“You did something good out there..”

“What do you mean?”

“You just bought a breakfast to homeless girl outside. You’ve got a good heart.”

I felt a little baffled. There’s no way that she just saw what I did because her office is forty floors up, literally the top floor of the building.

“How did you-”

“How did I see it? Just because I’m forty floors up it doesn’t mean that I can’t see everything around me.”

“I believe that’s one of your impressive talents.”

Lilith then laughed, she then handed me a leather file folder with some paper work in it.

“I need you to take this to CYBERCOIN on Wall Street and have their CEO, Janice Robinson sign it. It’s the last ten pages of their company’s contract with us. I need you to have it done as soon as possible.”

“Do you need me to go now?”

“Yes, I know it’s only 7 AM but Janice wakes up at 5:15 AM every day and arrives at her office around 6:30 AM, so you should be fine. Go now.”

“Okay, off I go.”

I then left the office and took the number 6 train headed downtown all the way to Canal Street. As soon as I get off the subway station, I sensed that something isn’t right. It felt like something is coming my way, the feeling of doom itself was within the moment. It can’t be depression or sadness. It’s beyond those two. I finally reached the office of Janice Robinson, the CEO of CYBERCOIN, an online currency that’s taking over the use of credit cards. When I met Janice, I’m surprised to see how young she is. I would say about twenty seven years old. She’s all dressed up as if she just stepped out of a fashion photo shoot, real classy.

“Are you from the Hamilton Corporation? Janice asked.

“Yes, I have the last ten pages of the contract that we needed you to sign.” I replied.

I handed over the contract to her and she started signing.

“So how long have you been working for Lilith?” She asked.

“Today is actually my first day.” I replied.

“Oh wow, congratulations! Lilith is a terrific person to work for, her company has been very generous to me all these years.. What’s your name again?”

“It’s Lorenzo. Lorenzo Basque.”

She then finished signing the paperwork and gave it back to me.

“It’s a pleasure meeting you Lorenzo, send my regards to Lilith.”

“I will, nice to meet you too”.

I left Janice’s office and headed to the exit of the building. As soon as I got out of the building on Wall Street, that feeling of dread came rushing through my veins all over again. I felt anxious and nervous at the same time, not knowing the exact reason. I just knew that something was coming. Something was wrong. I continued to walk towards the nearest subway station an noticed a black hearse parked on the corner of the street, all of a sudden, someone fell on it. It shattered the window glasses. It startled me.

“What the fuck!!!!” I said to myself.

People started to gather in front of the hearse car with a dead body on top of it. I looked at the bleeding face and it was Janice Robinson, CEO of Cybercoin. Her eyeballs looked towards the spot where I was standing and stayed there. It scared the shit out of me and I walked away. I took out my phone and called Lilith.

“Hello Katya, could you connect me to Lilith right away? This is an emergency!” I frantically said.

“What is it child?” Lilith asked.

“Lilith! Janice Robinson is dead. She jumped off from the top of her building!! I don’t know what the fuck’s going on!”

“Calm down, why don’t you meet me for lunch at the Bowery district? I will text you the name of the restaurant and the address.”

“OK, I will go ahead and do that.”

I hailed a cab and it took me to the Bowery District. Lilith texted me the information of the restaurant. It’s on Lafayette Street, the place is called INDOCHINE, a French-Vietnamese bistro frequented by Andy Warhol, Madonna, fading celebrities, and all the fucking posers. I arrived at the restaurant and Lilith was already there. The table she picked was literally in the middle of the room. Beneath the glass chandelier. I arrived at the restaurant and there was Lilith, sitting and waiting for me. I looked around there was probably seven or nine people inside the restaurant. I sat on the table with her. She greeted me with a smile, me however was still freaked out about everything.

“Are you hungry?” Lilith asked.

“No, but I sure could use a drink right now.” I responded.

A blonde waitress comes over and took our orders. Lilith ordered a medium rare steak with a glass of merlot, and I had a full glass of MAKER’S MARK on the rocks.

“You look very stressed out child, what’s bothering you?” She asked.

“What’s bothering me?! The woman who signed our paperwork just killed herself! Are you that naïve about human life?!” I replied.

“Lorenzo, you are totally overreacting… Why don’t you drink that glass of water, it will make you feel better..”

“No! You will tell me what the fuck is going on here!”

Lilith looked at me straight in the eyes, like a predator about to kill its prey.

“You want the truth don’t you?”

“Yes, I want the fucking truth!”

The waitress finally brings over our order.

“Here’s the medium rare steak and MAKER’S MARK on the rocks.” The waitress said.

Lilith started devouring the medium rare steak that she ordered. She ate it like a beast.

“Will there be anything else?” the waitress asked me.

“No, I think we’re fine.” I replied.

The waitress left and resumed her work on other patrons in the restaurant. I looked at Lilith again as finished her steak and gulped down the glass of wine. I started drinking my bourbon, still feeling strange about everything.

“That was a good steak..” She said as she wiped off her lips with the table napkin.

“Let’s cut to the chase, what the fuck is going on?!” I asked her again.

“I give people what they want, they enjoy everything that this life has to offer, they becomes their own Gods and Goddesses, but then they forgot that there’s always a price to pay for what I’ve given them.”

“Life is the price? Is that what you’re telling me?”

“Of course not, don’t be ridiculous. Most humans don’t really have lives. Besides, what’s the point of calling it life if you eventually die in the end?”

I finished my drink of bourbon and started chewing the crushed ice in it.

“So what are you saying?”

All the restaurant patrons stood up from their chairs and looked at me. Lilith stared at me with contempt in her face.
I also noticed that all the patrons got a revolver in their hands and pointed it in their heads. I looked around and then back at Lilith.

“What the fuck’s happening?!”

“Let me ask you Lorenzo, do you live in reality or fiction?”

“I will never live in reality! I will continue to live my life in fiction for all eternity!”

Lilith laughed at me and almost couldn’t stop. Then all the restaurant patrons fired their revolvers against their own heads and blood was everywhere. On the table cloth, on the wall, and on the floor. Lilith finally stopped laughing and stared at me with some kind of farewell in her face.

“You never learn Lorenzo, there’s no such thing as fiction or reality. You create your own world as you go along. Blood is the only currency I accept and it’s time to pay up.”

Lilith then took out a revolver from under the table and pointed the gun at me and pulled the trigger.

I heard the gunshot and I can’t see anything. Then I felt someone was touching my shoulder, I opened my eyes and started screaming. The female bartender in her early forties, with a hair styled like Cyndi Lauper, wearing blue jeans and a black t-shirt, took her hand off my shoulder.

“Hey, wake the fuck up, you’re dreaming!” She said.

My face was sweating and I looked around. I was still inside the Grassroots Tavern at St. Mark’s place in East Village. I apologized to the bartender and left quietly. I looked at the time on my BlackBerry and it was four thirty in the morning. It was all a bad dream. I had a taste of what’s life like if I ever made a deal with the devil. Although I died in the dream, I learned something from it. There are no shortcuts to any destination where you intend to live forever. Even if it’s Heaven or Hell. Back to my fucking reality, I still have to find myself a day job and find a place to live. I went back my Judy’s apartment in Queens and got a job at financial services firm the next day through a staffing agency. The office is located on Avenue of the Americas and 49th Street. At this point I decided to stop writing fiction and concentrated on reading books at Barnes & Noble in Union Square. I’m glad I found a job though. And I’m still freaked out about the nightmarish dream that I had about Lilith. But the last few words she told me got stuck in my head, “There’s no such thing as reality or fiction. You create your own world as you go along..” . In most ways I disagree with it and I still stand by the words that I told her. I will never live in reality, I will continue to live my life in fiction for all eternity. Life goes on!